Celebrity stories and gossip that make you go "W.T.F?"

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Celebrity W.T.F's Volume 213

Jennifer Lopez is reportedly expecting her first child with husband Marc Anthony, according to media reports. Jennifer recently appeared at an award ceremony sporting what appeared to be a small bump of a tummy and telltale grey roots. The following day, she abruptly cancelled her first concert tour without giving an explanation, further fuelling rumours of a pregnancy.

Gee, if grey roots and a round tummy are suppose to mean you're pregnant - then I've been carrying a fetus around since 1991.

Katie Holmes is reportedly exhausted and "constantly in tears" since giving birth to daughter Suri - sparking speculation she could have post partum depression. According to Britain's The Sun newspaper, friends say the actress breaks down and cries and seems "emotional and very tired" since giving birth. Last year Tom Cruise slammed Brooke Shields for admitting taking anti-depressants for post-natal depression.
One friend is quoted in Britain's The Sun newspaper as saying: "Katie told pals it's natural for new mums to experience strong emotions."

Yeah, but it's not natural for your husband to think you can deal with your mood swings and thoughts of suffocating your child by taking vitamins!

Paris Hilton's mother never got a gift from her heiress daughter. A gift bag containing nearly $10,000 worth of Christian Dior shoes, sunglasses, handbags and perfume was stolen from outside the Hilton home. A delivery person set the package down outside the home's gate to ring the intercom when a passenger in a passing car snatched the gifts.
"A fellow just whizzed by and grabbed the package." A spokesperson said.

Which is odd because usually it's one of the Hilton women who grab the delivery man's package.

Britney Spears who is already under the public eye for putting her son in danger several times is at it again....she was seen motoring through Malibu with the baby allegedly "lolling about" in his child seat.It has sparked fears the eight-month-old tot was not properly strapped into his chair.
An onlooker told Britain's Daily Mirror newspaper: "He didn't look properly strapped in at all. There certainly didn't appear to be any restraints on his shoulders."

Here's the pic, you decide. Baby Sean's a weeble. Weebles wobble but, they never fall down.
Mama Spears should get a citation for going out in public in curlers!!!!

Uma Thurman has always hated her body. The actress is renowned for her incredible body but, says she has never been comfortable with the way she looks.
She said, "I was always physically insecure. I had big feet, too tall, not co-ordinated, or together."

She forgot to mention she has legs up to her forehead. She may not be comfortable with her body but, everyone else is!

Paul McCartney and his wife of four years,Heather Mills, are separating. The couple said in a joint statement. "Both of us still care about each other very much but have found it difficult to maintain a normal relationship with constant intrusion into our private lives and we have actively tried to protect the privacy of our child," the statement continued. " We hope, for the sake of our baby daughter, that we will be given some space and time to get through this difficult period."

Stupid Paul never got Heather to sign a pre-nupt. Ironically, this works out great for Heather cuz she'll be able to stand on her own two feet. Now, she really has a leg up on Paul cuz he doesn't have a leg to stand on........ Ok, ok, I'll stop with the leg jokes.

Christina Aguilera and Mariah Carey are having a battle of the divas. It all started when Christina told GQ Magazine, "Mariah was never cool to me. To the point that one time we were at a party and I think she got really drunk, and she had just really derogatory things to say to me in front of [Aguilera trails off] . . . But it was at that time that she had that breakdown, so she might have been very medicated."
When Mariah heard about this she spewed back, "I had hoped that Christina was in a better place now than the last time I saw her, when she showed up uninvited at one of my parties and displayed questionable behavior."

One of these women is a liar, a drunk and has a warped sense of perception.

And more fighting....Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan are at each other's throats these days. It seems Paris and her sisterNicky weren't impressed with being interrupted by Lindsay on a recent night out. As Paris' rep explains: "Paris was having a conversation with a couple of friends, Lindsay approached her table and at that moment Paris felt she was being interrupted and didn't wish to speak to Lindsay. A couple of words were exchanged and Lindsay went back to her table."

It was probably nothing. Here's what I think happened.
Lindsay: "Paris, got any blow?"
Paris: "No, all out."
Lindsay: "Ok, later...."
You know how these things always get blown out of proportion.

Life & Style Magazine says Britney's got a divorce plan. (Yeah, she's NOT getting one) Also focus's on celeb diet secrets. Probably involving seaweed and vomiting every two hours.

STAR Magazine claims Denise Richards and Richie Sambora have run off together. Also the best and worst bikini bodies.

IN TOUCH WEEKLY reports Heather Locklear has already had enough of David Spade.

US WEEKLY says Britney has given Kevin an ultimatum to clean up his act or get out. This is ultimatum number what? I have lost track.

Britney really is stupid. Um, I meant pregnant. Stupid and pregnant.

Jennifer Garner glows as she arrives at the David Letterman show.

Ellen Pompeo who plays Meredith on Grey's Anatomy. Her anatomy is looking a little grey if you ask me...

Drew Barrymore hails a cab.

Katie and Tom at his kids soccer game. Katie's stretch marks are showing...if you click the image you can see it better. Yeah, I'm mean but, your worse cuz I know you are going to click.

Sandra Bullock and her hubby Jesse on the bleachers.

Courtney Love trying shoes on. Note to self: Do not wear low cut top to try shoes on unless sales clerk is Brad Pitt look-a-like.

Jennifer Love Hewitt loves reading the tabloids. Hopefully she'll skip the page where they butcher her new awful haircut.

She wore an itsy bitsy teenie weenie....polka dot....It's Jessica Alba looking gorgeous.

Tom Hanks at a premiere of his new film "DAVINCI INQUEST"

Most people undress Eva Longoria with their eyes. Drunken Teri Hatcher takes it literally.

And then there were two. Elliot's gone.....

Now she protects his head.



Blogger Chica said...

ha, ha, ha too funny. I always think it is crazy that people so much for a wedding (paul m. and what's her face)just to get divorced so soon. It just does not make sense. I would ask for my gift back.

10:03 PM  
Blogger verniciousknids said...

I clicked :p

7:42 AM  

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