Celebrity stories and gossip that make you go "W.T.F?"

Friday, April 14, 2006

Celebrity W.T.F's Volume 193

Lindsay Lohan became enraged when she sent over a round of drinks to Jessica Simpson and director Brett Ratner. Apparently the two who were sitting at a nearby table never bothered to thank her. Relays a source, "Lindsay said, 'What's the matter? When your sister is around, you can talk sh-t about me, but now that Ashlee's not here, what are you going to do? C'mon! I'm 19 and you're 25. Say something, you coward!"

Why would you buy a round of drinks for someone who talks sh$t about you? And they say Jessica's supposed to be the stupid one?

Antonio Banderas has dismissed rumors that his wife Melanie Griffith is an alcoholic. A recent photo of Melanie attending an AA meeting appeared on the front cover of the National Enquirer. However, Antonio insists the rumours are wrong and he's says there is an explanation.
He says, "My wife has been an alcoholic her whole life, or so AA says, and she's been going to meeting for years. They're just trying to make a story. Whatever. She's sponsoring people now. It's just a normal thing."

I suppose he thinks his wife's gi-normous lips are normal too? Maybe it's Antonio who has the drinking problem.

Jennifer Lopez told Harpers Bazaar Magazine that Marc Anthony has made her a changed woman. She said, "He makes me slow down and eat lunch, which I used not to do," she says. "We have different philosophies. I've been so disciplined. His process is 'Chill, don't kill yourself.'

Seems to me it's manorexic Marc who needs to slow down and eat some lunch.

Jordan has given up food to lose weight. She says she has been adhering to a strict of diet of fruit smoothies, vegetable juice and water to achieve the perfect figure.
She said, "If I'm feeling bloated in the morning, I'll have juice for breakfast, two litres of water She also told Star magazine, "There have been remarks in the newspapers about how skinny I look, but as a matter of fact, I have actually put on weight. I prefer being thinner - I hate my gut now."

Yes, most women who hate their guts dress like this. What gut?

Jennifer Garner is nervous about giving birth as her character on the show ALIAS despite having given birth for real. Jennifer is quoted in Scotland's Daily Record newspaper as saying: "I have been dreading this moment as long as I have known it was coming. I can't even imagine being in front of my crew. I still get embarrassed any time I have to be naked around them, because those are my guys. They are all like brothers or father figures, so it will be a rough day for me."

Did I miss something? Do you get buck naked when you give birth? I know it helps with conception but, otherwise I am stumped here. Someone please enlighten me.

Tom Cruise claims he knew Katie was pregnant before she did. He says he had a feeling when he asked her to marry him that she was with child. He told GQ magazine, "I just picked something up. I knew at that moment that she was pregnant."
Tom described his fist date with Katie as "the best day of his life", adding: "She's just right for me."

Katie's submissive, brainwashed, agreeable and does whatever Tom wants her to. Ofcourse she is just right for him. Katie even turns a blind eye when Tom has guys night at the house and all those Villiage People impersonators show up.

Actor Alec Baldwin claims he doesn't find Paris Hilton attractive and is shocked by her lack of common sense. He explains: "When I did 'The cat in the hat' I had a scene with her. She was lovely, very sweet. But when she decided to make that sex tape, she really put the 'd in 'dumb'."

In her defense she can suck on a lollipop, gamble (with help) and empty out a bottle of wine all at the same time. (As shown here) She may be dumb but, she can sure multi-task.

Jennifer Aniston credits yoga for helping her get over her split from Brad Pitt. She says it calms, relaxes and invigorates her and puts her in a peaceful place.

You'd think all that bending, downward dogging, twisting and light sweating would depress Jennifer even more. Isn't that how Brad and Angelina spend their nights?

Tom Cruise in Gentleman's Quarterly.

Kate Moss in a new phone ad. Besides phone sex operators....AND their customers...who the heck talks naked on the telephone??

Ladies (And some of you men) brace yourselves. Grab a drool bucket and feast your eyes on the outtake photos of Wentworth Miller from PEOPLE Magazine....a.k.a Scofield.

Poor baby, will he ever get out of that place?

Who knew I could ever love a man with a widow's peak?

How this man is not a Calvin Klein underwear model is beyond me.

Only he could wear real fur and P.E.T.A wouldn't notice. They'd be too lost in those eyes.
If these pics are the out takes can you IMAGINE what the good ones look like?

Scofield sitting around waiting for me to make my congical visit.

Remember that Britney giving birth sculptor that was all controversial? The artist is at it again. This time his subject is Kate Moss.

Pink paid a visit to HUMBERSIDE Collegiate in Toronto to talk to over 700 girls about body image and the media. She told them not to be "Stupid Girls" (which is what the song is about)

Seal, Heidi Klum and gorgeous baby Henry out and about.

Eva Mendes is certainly celebrating something. Or she's a big lush.

Denise Richards with daughter Lola. Her kids never have shoes on.

Britney and Kevin at a Dallas Nightclub. Britney looks like she is trying to pull off some swedish schoolgirl look with the hair. Too bad this wasn't the same night Sean Preston fell out of his high chair. He could of grabbed on to Mama's pigtails and took her down with him.

Heather Locklear really, really, really, really, really, likes tennis.

Mariah Carey on MTV to introduce her new video "SAY SOMETHING" - Hey Mariah, how about next time wear something!

Carmen Electra looking funky on MTV.

Lindsay Lohan's wax figure revealed. It looks more alive than she does.

Kylie Minogue is planning a major career comeback! She's looking great after recovery from breast cancer.

Kobe Bryant's wife is holding on to her pregnant stomach which was probably conceived in order to hold on to her man. He's got wandering eyes, hands, name it. Slimeball.

Prince William and Prince Harry. Fine men in uniform. Mommy Diana would be so proud!

Men don't really have to try to get into Paris's pants. They are pretty much already down to begin with. Thus, her popularity.

And I leave you with Wentworth yet again...Here he is on the set of Prison Break asking me what I want for dinner and if I liked the roses.



Blogger T-man said...

My mom says that Wentworth guy is starting to grow on her but she doesn't know why. It looks like he's already taken though :)

Prince William is a good looking male human. If he was a poodle, he might be as handsome as I am (if he was lucky!)

11:51 PM  
Blogger Chelsea said...

Mama really loves Papa - she just likes looking at Wentworth. Papa really loves Mama...he just likes looking at Mariah Carey.

Humans are strange.

I love looking at you my Romeo...


12:13 PM  

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