CUZ I SAID SO!

Celebrity stories and gossip that make you go "W.T.F?"

Monday, April 03, 2006

Celebrity W.T.F's Volume 184

Carmen Electra is installing an aerial circus hoop in her home so she can thrill her husband with X-rated nude tricks. Carmen can't wait to perform circus arts for Dave Navarro while she's naked. All this she revealed on a recent episode of "The Tonight Show". Then she demonstrated some of her circus skills for actor Rob Schneider by thrusting her legs in the comic actor's lap while talk show host Jay Leno looked on in shock.

Jay Leno doesn't appear shocked to me. I believe the word is titillated. Carmen could of blinded Rob with those shoes if she got him in the eye! WTF was she thinking? When she said she wanted to be a circus performer did she mean A circus freak???










Mary J. Blige was horrified by reports that Whitney Houston is hooked on drugs and living in filth. The National Enquirer magazine ran shocking images of Whitney's bathroom littered with drug paraphernalia, including a crack-smoking pipe and cocaine-covered spoons.
Blige told Britain's The Sun newspaper: "I'm saddened by the whole thing. Whitney is technically the best vocalist in the business."

Mary J Blige didn't know Whitney had a drug problem? What? Is Mary J on crack also?? Living under a rock perhaps?










Jennifer Lopez may adopt a Puerto Rican baby. Although she is desperate for a child of her ow, she may adopt if she can't conceive. Reports claim she has been trying to get pregnant for two years.
A source revealed to Britain's Grazia magazine: "Her relationship with Marc has deepened through this. And Jennifer has changed. She used to like immaculate white rooms with white sheets. Now she wants some grubby little handprints from her baby."

It seems being married to Marc Anthony has gotten J-Lo used to having grubby little handprints all over her.











J-Lo's baby will be the apple of her eye. Except in a pear shape. Woah, diapers are going to be expensive!







Desperate Housewive's Eva Longoria wants to have Michael Douglas as her next lover in the hit TV show. The two starred alongside in the drama The Sentinel.
She says, "He could play my older lover."









Catherine Zeta-Jones, Michael's wife is going to be pissed! Michael's already busy playing Catherine's older lover. The nerve of Eva!







Legendary performer Liza Minelli has had it with men. Liza who split from fourth husband, producer David Gest in 2003, insists she won't be racing back down the aisle anytime soon.
She explains, "Look at my track record. I have good taste in friends and lousy taste in husbands." She admits she's "seeing a couple of people" but insists, "I'm sick of sex! I don't give a rat's a**! I care about integrity and kindness."

Um, Michael Jackson was the best man at her last freak show wedding. So if her taste in friends far exceeds her taste in husbands then I guess she's right!









MAGAZINE SCANS
Pink is May's Cover Girl for SEVENTEEN Magazine













Although Catherine Zeta-Jones may appear to be standing under Kate Moss's window, she is actually just on the set of a movie.













More zany Carmen Electra moves...










Naomi Campbell seems to think this shirt is funny. Obviously she is repressing the realization that she is a violent time bomb just waiting to go off. Just ask her maid, and her assistant, and her agent and the fool who asks her for an autograph thinking she is Tyra Banks....Ouch.






Scarlet Johannson must be auditioning for 9 Mile. You know, the sequel to 8 Mile. How else do you explain this outfit?













Angelina looks radiant as she leaves a restaurant with Maddox.













Avril Lavigne and her boyfriend Derrick both look like they need vitamins and a tanning bed.













Julia Roberts takes a bow opening night of her new Broadway play.










Jennifer and Vince doing some re-takes for their film "The Break Up".













Later, Vince shows some affection to Jen. Remember people...they call it "acting" for a reason.













Heather Locklear and her daughter hang out.













Gwen Stefani has lunch with her parents.










Pamela Anderson at a press conference to promote her appearance at the Juno awards Sunday night.













John Stamos gets a kiss from Teri Hatcher. Does Ryan Seacrest know? Better yet, does Ryan Seacrest care? He does care. Only because he wants to kiss John probably.













And while we're on the topic of Desperate Housewives....Eva brought Marcia along to one of Tony's basketball games. Tony's team won thus the ridiculous grin on Eva's face.













Britney and her thermos of coffee, or whiskey, or wine...hey whatever gets you through the day when you are married to someone like Kevin.













Ellen De Generes horses around.













Britney ventures out with Baby Sean. What's with the "FREE TO BE" on her shirt? Free to be what? - Stupid? Pregnant? Barefoot? Barefoot and Pregnant?













PRISON BREAK IS ON MONDAY NIGHT!!! Can't wait to spend an hour with Wentworth!









CUZ I SAID SO!

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