Celebrity stories and gossip that make you go "W.T.F?"

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Celebrity W.T.F's Volume 181

Fox is adding another year to "Prison Break's" sentence. The hit show returned to strong ratings last week after a four-month hiatus. In its two Monday 8 p.m. airings, "Prison Break" has increased Fox's season-to-date ratings by 57% among adults 18-49.

Gee I wonder why women just love this show. Men in nice shoes do too. Heck, even straight men want to watch and follow the map - and you know how much they hate to ask for directions.

Jennifer Aniston is planning on marrying Vince Vaughn during a ceremony at Oprah Winfrey's home. Aniston is allegedly desperate to beat her ex-husband and his girlfriend up the aisle and is planning a summer wedding. And just recently Oprah showed her support for Aniston by vowing never to have Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie on her popular day time chat show.

In other words they turned Oprah down when she begged them to be guests. I suppose the "horrible" Brangelina were too busy making goodwill ambassador appearances and spending time with their adopted children while Oprah and Jen got drunk and men bashed.

Rod Stewart likes his fiancee Penny Lancaster's post baby body. Penny, who gave birth to baby Alistair back in November has started doing gentle exercise, but is keen to retain her new shape.
Lancaster says, "I waited six weeks before exercising. I'm more curvaceous than I was and Rod wants me to stay the way I am."

Honey, when Rod said he wanted you to stay that way- he meant young. Once you start showing wear and tear he'll trade you in for a younger model with no hesitation. All his other women had an expiry date. Just ask his four other ex-wives.

An online casino has dished out $40,000 for nude pictures of Britney Spears. Supposedly they when from Britney was a teen and may have even been taken by then boyfriend Justin Timberlake. The National Enquirer is reporting that a friend of Britney says the star "is flipping out." She's even more furious because "the whole thing is a put up job - the photos are Britney's head put on someone else's body," the friend tells the magazine.

So if they were actually her nude teen body would that make it ok? I'm confused. I don't know what the big deal is. Pictures like this of Britney are everywhere. One move of the pearls in this pic and you see it all. She really should take the money. I don't think she's gonna be offered money for nude shots now that she is letting herself go. She'll probably be paying us in five years to look at her nude.

Jude Law is staying away from women following the breakdown of his relationship with Sienna Miller.The actor was approached by a glamorous blonde at a party last week - however he made it clear that he wasn't interested. According to the Sunday Mirror, Law was overheard saying, "It's nice to meet you. But I am with my friends tonight."

Jude probably had a hooker waiting for him back at his motel room. This womanizer will never stay away from women.

Madonna wants Hillary Clinton to run for president in 2008, although she's convinced America isn't yet ready for a female leader. She tells Out magazine, "Hillary should go for it. I don't think now is necessarily her time, or the Democrats' time, but she should certainly go for it. You've got to start somewhere. Women have ruled over millions, it's not an abstract concept. But in America, men are still afraid. And I don't think women are too comfortable with the idea of a female in charge. I find that really amazing."

I think Americans would be ok with a female in charge. Although she would have to be in black thigh high boots and carry a bull whip. HEY!! Madonna would be a perfect president.

Pink says her brother once stole her lesbian lover. The singer says she had to have therapy after the split, which she's still upset about years later. She confessed, "I had a girlfriend when I was 13 and she left me for my brother! "That kind of f**ked me up."We held hands and we kissed and that was my girlfriend, that's what you do when you're 13! And she left me for my f**king brother! It was bizarre andtwisted and f****d up and gross."

Or....maybe she just got sick of Pink using the F word.

Mariah Carey on the cover of P Magazine looking like she has to.

More Mariah and the magic of photoshoppe.

Nicole Richie featured in SEVENTEEN Magazine. Yes, because young girls need to look up to people who are starving themselves to death.

Nicole again in PEOPLE Magazine.

Britney and baby Sean Preston leaving a department store. He's got his Mama's feet. Ew.

Jessica Simpson looks like she just figured out what chicken of the sea is.

Madonna and her daughter Lourdes out and about.

Jennifer Lopez goes shopping.

Hope J-Lo doesn't stop off at the park. She may see her ex - Ben Affleck's new wife Jennifer Garner and baby Violet cuddling.

And the other Jennifer...Aniston faking big smiles at the premiere of her latest movie "Friends with Money". Something tells me it will get bad reviews and I'm not even psychic.

Reese Witherspoon and co-star Christina Ricci on set of the film "Penelope"

Kristin Davis (Charlotte of Sex and The City) must be full of it.

Well this settles it then. Clay Aiken is straight.

Pamela Anderson at the opening of her new restaurant "BLACKSTREET" where she ironically sprays herself.

Braddy boy goes for more flying lessons.

Farrah Fawcett seems shocked looking at pictures of herself from the 80's. Why put herself through the torture???

Sheryl Crow horses around.

Scarlet Johanson protects her doggie from the busy sidewalks of New York.

Britney steps out with her weasel. They are at a party for his new cd.

Ellen and her kitten Portia have fun.

Vanessa Manillo hangs out with Nick Lachey on the set of his new music video. Hmmmm.....

Jake Gyyllenhaal goes for a run.

Brooke Hogan's father Hulk should tell her to stop making stupid faces. It may stay that way. Oh....wait a minute....

Pamela Anderson seems to have left her bra back in the Hard Rock Cafe. I feel sorry for whomever gets their foot tangled in that!

Fergie of the Black Eyed Peas celebrates. Go's her birthday, she's gonna party like it's her birthday, she's gonna sip bacardi like it's her birthday.

And either Fergie is partying with the Pussy Cat dolls or she hired a bunch of hookers to pretend to be her friends.

Paula's got a new boyfriend. His name is Tony Schiena. Not bad. Good job Paula!!! Good job!!

Katie Holme's is due any minute now.

Here she is with Tom. Why is he looking so stressed out? He's not the one who has to push out a human head from his private parts without making a peep!

Tori Spelling will look like Charo in five years tops. Heck, she looks like her now. Coochie coochie.

And now for some yummy guys. Who's the leader of the band that's made for you and me? B-O-N - J-O-V-I.....

David Beckham leaves a restaurant. The yummiest thing on the menu just walked out.

Clive Owens looks dangerous in a sexy bad boy type of way.

Anyone need their bush trimmed? The gardener from DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES...Jesse Metcalfe comes out of hiding.

Mariah Carey has clothes on. It must be sub below zero out.

Marc Anthony tells it like it is. Ouch.



Blogger yllwdaisies said...

I still think Clay Aiken is gay. Look at his face, that's the face of a gay guy cupping a girl's breasts. A straight guy would have some "glazed over look" in his eyes, n'est pas?

Also, I heard that Jesse Metcalfe is *desparate*. heehee. No, seriously, I heard that now he can't get a role anywhere, & that he couldn't get into a club. He couldn't get into the club from the front door, so he went around back, & they still wouldn't let him in.

That Marc Anthony. tsk-tsk. Who knew he was such a class act?

9:50 PM  

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