Celebrity stories and gossip that make you go "W.T.F?"

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Celebrity W.T.F's Volume 173

Lindsay Lohan claims she desperately needs a partner who can handle her crazy life and who feels comfortable with the constant media glare surrounding her.
She says, "I have paparazzi following me every day. I'd like to have a boyfriend. It would be nice to have a strong partner who has confidence, loyalty and a good sense of humor, because I come with a lot of baggage."

Not sure if she is referring to her torrid childhood or her massive collection of handbags that are bigger than she is.

Madonna surprised Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall when she phoned to tell the British royal they are distantly related. Madonna who has blood-links with singer Celine Dion, is urging her 'relations' to join her and trace their entire family tree.
A source explains: "Camilla and Madonna are both descended from Zacharie Cloutier, who lived from 1617 to 1708, and Camilla and Celine descend from Jean Guyon, who lived from 1619 to 1694. "Both Jean and Zacharie died in Chateau-Richer, Quebec. Because of their unusual French-Canadian ancestry, they are all blood relations. Madonna is absolutely fascinated by this."

Ofcourse! Yes! They are related. It's the horse connection.
Madonna fell off of one, Camilla looks like one and Celine's husband must be hung like one. (How else do you explain the creepy grandpa attraction?)

Catherine Zeta-Jones went undercover in a restaurant for a week to get in training for a part as a chef in the romance film Mostly Martha. The head chef of the eatery told People magazine: "She's a great garnisher, drizzling oil and balsamic on plates. She does a nice job."

She better be slicing and dicing with precision. After all her handy sword work in Zorro.

Sharon Stone was determined the erotic thriller 'Basic Instinct 2' should shock its audience and told the director not to waste her full-frontal nude shots.
She revealed: "I felt we should hold off on the full nudity for a while in the movie and then I thought that when I ultimately did do the nude scene it should be done in a startling way that would be disturbing and threatening."
Not really surprising. I don't think Sharon would appear in a toothpaste commercial that didn't have a kinky part in it.

In an interview with American magazine Blender, Kevin Federline claims he is so busy recording songs, he barely has any time for his wife and son Sean Preston, as well as his two older children from his previous relationship. When asked what he’ll do if his upcoming album fails. “I’ll be at your local strip club, but I’ll be the one dancing.” he replied.

Nobody wants to hear this guy sing. What the hell makes him think we want to see him naked?

According to STAR Magazine, Vince Vaughn wants to fatten up Jennifer Aniston. Apparently he is ordering really fattening foods for dinner, double orders of dessert followed by a huge high fat latte. And to everyone's surprise, the thin Jennifer, who notoriously ate the same low-cal salad daily for 10 years while shooting Friends, is really digging in. Vince thinks she'll be hotter when she's heavier, and apparently she's not disagreeing.

Whatever it takes to keep her mouth busy so she can't talk anymore.

And for every Jennifer story, you know there has to be a Brangelina one. Once again, Brad and Angelina are supposedly are getting married next week on a boat on Italy's Lake Como, followed by a reception at a waterfront hotel.

Don't know if it's true but, had to report it. Just in case.

Rumor mill has it that Charlize Theron and her long time boyfriend Stuart Townsend are split up. Charlize's publicist says it's a crock. These two are still together! YAY!

The Barkers with their daughter Alabama in OK! Magazine.

Beyonce in MAXIM

Britney seems to be practising voodoo on her balcony. Somewhere Christina Aguilera just yelped in pain.

Or maybe it's a Drew Barrymore voodoo doll. She seems to be in pain here.

Jake Gyllenhaal
just went shopping.

Star Jones at a party....enjoying the VIEW.

Matt Damon's wife Luciana is adorably pregnant....or she swallowed a basketball.

Jessica Simpson shops to her heart's content. And Nick can't say a darn thing about it!

Reese Witherspoon on the set of her new movie "PENELOPE"

Vin Diesel gives out autographs.

Jennifer Lopez has an impressive profile.

And I'd be remiss if I did not include her blades.

Pamela Anderson leaving a party with a strange mark on her boob.

No, they aren't seems to be something she or someone else wrote?? Pam...ever heard of a memo pad?



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