Celebrity stories and gossip that make you go "W.T.F?"

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Celebrity W.T.F's Volume 152

Christian Slater is currently fighting for joint custody of his two children. Christian and his wife, Ryan Haddon divorced last February after five years of marriage citing irreconcilable differences. According to divorce documents Slater is desperate for full access to his six year old Jaden and four year old Eliana.

Everytime these celebrity men want full custody to the kids - I often wonder if it's because the nanny is hot. I can't help it. Blame Jude Law, not me for being so cynical.

Paris Hilton is hiring a Chihuahua to accompany her to this year's Brit Awards. Paris is missing her own Chihuahua's Tinkerbell and Bambi while she has been in the UK.
A source told the Daily Star: "Paris really misses her Chihuahuas when she leaves the States and mentioned she can think of nothing sweeter than hiring one. So she has her heart set on a mini long-haired Chihuahua called LouLou and will have her hire him from a specialist dog agency."

It's a shame you can't rent pride or lease a bit of class. The poor dog. Lou Lou, honey, you'll be in my prayers tonight.

Matthew McConaughey raved about girlfriend Penelope Cruz during a recent appearance on Oprah Winfrey's show. Matthew has been dating Penelope for 18 months and insists she never ceases to amaze him, because she has an honesty about her that is completely refreshing.
McConaughey told Oprah: "She sees everything for the first time even if she's already seen it before. That's refreshing. She takes nothing for granted. She's very pure on the inside."

Pure on the inside. That is a really nice thing for a man to say about his woman. I ain't gonna touch this one, I am going to keep this pure.....being Valentine's and all.
(If they break up next week I am going to be all over that- just so you know)

Penelope Cruz is at the centre of pregnancy rumours. A photograph was recently taken of the actress looking plumper than usual as she relaxed on a Mexican beach with Matthew McConaughey.
A source told Britain's News of The World newspaper: "There was no mistaking the slight bulge in her belly."

This isn't the actual photo but, C'mon! Can't a woman get bloated now and then? Ever heard of Irritable Bowel Syndrome? One cauliflower too many and presto....your tummy is five months pregnant!

Chris Martin of Coldplay almost revealed all to 7,000 US fans when his trousers fell down onstage. The singer was mid-performance in California, when the wardrobe malfunction left him almost naked. Chris turned to his wife Gwyneth Paltrow who was in the VIP area and said, "You can only really get away with this if you've got an as$ as good as Brad Pitt's".
Gwyneth, who dated Pitt a while back, blushed at the joke as her husband began singing an impromptu song about his backside.

Chris is no Brad, but, he knows it. Still, I find him oddly attractive in a "Ashley from Sin Cities" kind of way. If you don't know what I am referring to then you probably don't want to know. Let's just say "Showcase" is my safe word.

Jessica Alba's 'Into The Blue' co-star Paul Walker is obsessed with her butt. The actor admits he couldn't stop staring at her derriere all the way through filming.
Walker is quoted in Britain's Daily Mirror newspaper as saying: "I couldn't take my eyes off that as$. I'm sorry she's so beautiful."

Here's a picture of what he is talking about and why he had a hard time concentrating on anything else while working with her.
Uh, Uh, Uh.....what was I saying again?

Beyonce Knowles is being bombarded with hate mail for selling animal fur in her fashion range. The singer has been sent sacks of letters since her label, Dereon, started selling clothes made of rabbit and chinchilla fur and teddy bears made of mink. Furious animal rights campaigners have even threatened to leave carcasses outside the star's home, according to a report in Britain's News of The World newspaper.

How moronic of all parties involved. A teddy bear made of mink? C'mon!!! Only thing worse is that the "animal rights" people now want to get revenge by throwing dead animals on Beyonce's lawn? Duh....she's just gonna have someone sew them together and wear them to the Oscars!

Kanye West says he is a sex addict and always carries porn with him at all times. The rapper, a devout Christian, says he has to make love four times a night, then again in the morning.
He is quoted in Britain's The Sun newspaper as saying: "I think I have a sexual problem, a sexual addiction. I want to do it all the time."

What does he mean he has porn on him at all times? I don't think I want to know. Maybe if he could get himself to last longer than 2 minutes and 41 seconds he wouldn't be so obsessed with it.

Britney Spears has reportedly been having secret meetings with ex-husband Jason Alexander. Rumor has it she has turned to her ex who she was married to for 55 hours for comfort following a series of fights with husband Kevin Federline. She has allegedly been slipping off to Jason's apartment while pretending to visit her dad Jamie, who lives in the same block.

And last week they said Shar Jackson (Kevin's ex) was dating him. Next week the story will be that Kevin Federline is dating Jason Alexander.....sheesh!

British model Jordan's book A Whole New World just came out last week in the UK and is already the No.1 book in the country. She's also working on a novel to be released this July. When asked about where her inspiration for writing comes, she had this to say: "I don't read books, so there's nothing I can compare it to."

She has never read a book! Not because she is stupid. I am sure it's because she gets horrible cramps in her arms. Just think how hard it would be for her to hold a book up so that she can see what the pages actually say......another downside to implants.

Nicole Richie on her cell phone.

Vince Vaughn went out with Jennifer Aniston for her recent birthday. Not sure why they stopped to play hide and seek....

Eva Longoria seems irritated as she rushes to the airport.

Lindsay Lohan looks like she is auditioning for a movie role to play Renee Zellweger. You know, the old "sucking on a lemon" look.

Jessica Simpson gets gas. She used to get gas a lot on the Newlywed show with her burping.

Melissa Joan Hart known mostly for playing "Sabrina the Teenage Witch" had her baby. Isn't he cute? I mean the baby's ok and all but, look at THAT dog!

Julia Roberts and hubby Danny Moder walk the twins. The baby bag matches Danny's shirt. Good accesorizing!

Braddy, Angelina and Zahara walk by a black picket fence....ooh the irony.

Bob Barker may look as though he is really interested in Tyra Banks is saying but, make no mistake he is looking at her boobs. In fact, with his track record, he's probably placing a bid.

Josh Stone playfully posing with a demonic looking Victoria Beckham.

Jennifer Lopez waves at the crowd at one of her design fashion shows.

Nicky Hilton tells sister Paris a secret. Probably something really profound like, "I'm not wearing underwear. Are you?"

Hilary Duff listens to a secret from boyfriend Joel Madden. Likely "Could you just lose 10 more lbs to look like that model and maybe get a boob job?"

Jessica Simpson and her dog Daisy. Even the dog seems to be thinking "I'm with stupid"

George Clooney at a film festival in Venice.

Halle Berry's model boyfriend Gabriel Aubrey proves he's not just a pretty face. He's a gentleman as he opens the door for her.

Winona Ryder makes out with a drunken Val Kilmer. Not sure when these were taken but, this is why you should always check out a room for a flashing red light before you get down and dirty with a drunken perv.

I told you yesterday about Tori Spelling's guy getting that tattoo? Here's the photo.

Wow. Check out this wedding photo from Heather Locklear and Tommy Lee's wedding. NOBODY light a match ....Holy hairspray!

Eva Longoria makes Britain's GLAMOUR cover for March.

These are from the ever trusty NATIONAL ENQUIRER. It has a feature on stars and surgery. If you ever wondered why they call it "PLASTIC" surgery, take a gander at these...

Speculated boob jobs.....

And some more obvious ones...



Blogger [.a.n.d.r.e.w.] said...

Oh god those plastic surgeries are so gross and obvious. Although I do believe Jessica's are real... I think its hard for a woman to have big boobs in Hollywood and make people believe their fake! Well I guess thats mostly because 98% of Hollywood is plastic... =P

About Beyonce... IS IT REALLY NECESSARY TO KILL ANIMALS TO MAKE A FRICKING TEDDY BEAR? WTF IS WRONG WITH HER? Man shes out of her mind... >:| People like her and J.Lo piss me off, use faux fur GEEZ!

Omg that picture of Heather and Tommy's wedding is SO 80s! =P Hahaha I love it! ;)

9:22 PM  

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