Celebrity stories and gossip that make you go "W.T.F?"

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Celebrity W.T.F's Volume 71

What new Hollywood couple was seen dancing, singing and meeting the guy’s mom?
Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn, who made the cover of People magazine for doing just those things. With a smiling Jen on the cover, the headline reads:
"Hot New Romance" - IT'S OFFICIAL.... Jen and Vince are a couple! "
Larry Hackett, of People said, "These are two people who feel its OK to be out in public and showing their affection." Jen’s been single for 10 months following the breakup of her marriage to Brad Pitt. Jen and Vince were seen openly kissing all over Chicago.
Jen and Vince met on the "Break Up" set and have denied being a couple ever since.

I've been thinking. It's a sham. Jennifer is probably just trying to make Brad jealous. All the pics lately seem to say that Jen is with Vince but, this is what I think is REALLY going on.

Jen: "Thanks for coming over so fast."
Vince: "Are you sure the papparazzi is here? I didn't see anyone when I drove up."
Jen: "Yes I am sure, there's a guy up in the tree in the back. Hurry up."
Vince: "Yes, hurry, I am expecting a hooker at my place in an hour."

Jen: "I see the guy in the tree. Ok, let me grab your face."
Vince: "Ok now what?"
Jen: "Well try and seem interested will ya?"

Vince: "Ok, I'll hug you. That should convince them."
Jen: "Hug me? Brad will think we are friends! C'mon do something sexual!"
Vince:"You are straddling me! What more do you want?"

Jen: "Kiss me! Kiss me will ya? Hurry!"
Vince: "You're a great gal and all but, I prepaid for that hooker so I gotta go now."
Jen: "KISS ME or I will tell the tabloids you are gay."

Vince: "I can't believe you made me stay the night! My back is killing me from sleeping on that couch."
Jen: "We have to be convincing or I will never get Brad back!"
Vince: "He's with offense but, this is not going to work!:"
Jen: "Go home to your hooker you loser!"
Vince: "She's long gone by now, by the way you owe me $500!"

Madonna showed up at a College for film students yesterday. She took questions from the students and explained why she has become fascinated by Kabbalah.
She said, "Being a celebrity, you can get very caught up and seduced into believing and thinking that what you do is the most important thing in the world and get very attached to material things. I'm guilty of that and I'm still guilty of that, but hopefully I'm becoming less attached. Kabbalah may not be the best thing for everybody. It has worked for me."Madonna also offered a piece of personal advice: "The best thing to do is find one person in your life and try to love them unconditionally. If you've accomplished that, you've accomplished a lot."

Is it not ironic that the "Material Girl" would be preaching to others not to be materialistic???

Britney seems to be having trouble coping with her role as a new mom and breaks into crying at the drop of a hat. Said one source: "I think Britney is having a very hard time right now. She has turned to drinking wine to relax, washing away her stress."And while Britney had quit smoking when she became pregnant, the source said she's now smoking more than half a pack of Newport cigarettes a day, hoping it'll curb her appetite and help her lose weight.
And apparently Kevin is helping out. Another source said, Kevin is helping prepare bottles, feed the baby and change diapers.To help lift his wife's mood, Kevin even tried to entice Britney's family to visit. Said the source: "So far they've turned him down, saying they're just too busy to drop everything and run out to California."

Kevin's a good daddy. He went out to get beer and a case of coke with a friend. Everyone knows that is all the nutrients a baby really needs. Pablum is for sissies.

Kevin looks like he forgot something at the store. How about buying a box of condoms big guy??? You would do good for the envoirment if you stopped reproducing children that everybody else will eventually have to take care of.

A racy DVD, which goes on sale today reportedly contains footage of Tom Sizemore having sex. It also includes an interview with the troubled actor who gives details an overnight encounter with Paris Hilton when she was only 19. Tom claims that following a party at his house, he discovered that Paris had remained behind, the two spent the night together.
"She knew what she could do to people," he says. But according to Hilton, that encounter never happened. "It's disappointing that Mr. Sizemore has to use my name to sell his DVDs," she said in a statement. "He is not an acquaintance of mine nor have I ever had intimate relations with him."

Do I believe Tom Sizemore (whoever he is) Or do I believe that Paris, who has already had at least 3 sex tapes leak out was not STUPID enough to have sex with this man also?
All that money and she cannot afford a bra or a decent set of boobs?

According to the Daily Mail, Jude Law and his ex-wife Sadie Frost may be getting back together. An insider said: "They seem to have come full circle. Sadie has told friends that she still loves Jude and that he still loves her. They have already started behaving like a couple again and the next step could be getting back together."
These two were married then got a divorce. They have two children together. Sadie has split with her boyfriend, while Jude's relationship with Sienna Miller has been on the rocks since he slept with his children's nanny. Recent allegations that Sienna had a fling with new James Bond actor Daniel Craig haven't helped either.

Sadie likes to "swing" if you get my drift so Jude is better off with her. He can cheat every weekend with his partner and not even get in trouble. Makes me wonder why he left her in the first place?

The Sun reports that Sienna Miller popped a photographer who got too close to her. According to the paper, Miller was trying on headbands at department store Barney's when a photographer got in her face, so Miller smacked him.

It probably wasn't a papparazzi she hit, it was most likely a fan who mistook her for Peter Pan.
I really hate her haircut.

Ginger Spice is preggers! Otherwise known as Geri Halliwell. Although things aren't go so good with her boyfriend and father of the baby, Sacha Gervasi
A friend told the Daily Mail:"(Geri's) very upset her relationship with Sacha hasn't exactly gone to plan. But if she is alone when the baby arrives, so be it. She's a strong woman and will cope just fine." Onlookers recently saw the couple arguing at a lunch meeting.

So Ginger Spice is having a baby. Wonder what she will name him/her? Paprika? Poppyseed? Cinnamon? Curry? The possiblities are endless..... sounds like she could of used the spice in her relationship instead.

Kirsten Dunst got completely drunk then showed up at the premiere of her new movie, Elizabethtown. Kristin arrived on the red carpet hammered. Eye witnesses called her “trashy” and “piggish”. She continued to drink after the premiere as well, tossing back cocktails and getting very obnoxious.
Recently, she confided Jay Leno, “I stock up on Veuve Cliquot champagne. I buy it from Costco it's really cheap there. I have lots of alcohol and no food in my fridge."

They sell booze at Costco?
So what is Kirsten wants to get wrecked? What's the worst thing that could happen? She'll pass out and SPIDERMAN will come and save her.

Ashlee Simpson has ordered the male musicians in her band to take showers every day and use deodorant. She says: "I'll be on the road with five boys. And we have rules. Before we went on tour, I was like, 'Okay, no stinky shoes, everybody has to shower every day,' because they can start smelling really bad. And I said, 'When we're done with the shows you put deodorant on! I'm telling you, these rock star boys, when they go out on the road, they'll go like nine, ten days without showering."

Ashlee looks half decent here. The boys in her band must of had the same little "talk" with her.

Angelina and Brad are engaged, according to her BEOWULF co-star Ray Winstone. Ray is currently working with Jolie on the movie adaptation of the epic Beowulf poems.
He says, "She's getting married isn't she? Yes she is."
I know this is a stupid story but, I needed an excuse to use this photo. She is SOOOOOOOOO gorgeous.

Rose McGowan was apparently arrested yesterday at a party. I cannot find out the exact reason why but, the story seem to be that a man was standing uncomfortably close to Rose at the party. Words were exchanged, and she was escorted out. Rose's official response, according to her rep, "If you're going to be escorted out of a party, it might as well be in a Dolce & Gabanna dress."

True man. True.

And I was just going to say how thankful I was that Gwyneth hasn't been whining to the press lately......Apparently now she is complaining about living in London. She claims the streets are too dirty, customer service is 'just rubbish' and the weather is 'cold and depressing'. She recently spat her venom in an interview with Marie Claire magazine about what it is like to be living in London. Even though she says she has grown to like it - she adds: "My husband thinks I'm way too obsessed with cleanliness and germs. I'm just like, 'The street is filthy, could we take off our shoes before we come into the house?' He used to imitate me and say, 'Ewwww, oh my God!"

Even her husband gets sick of her whining, complaining and bit$hing. Whew - and we thought it was just us!

Victoria Beckham is patiently awaiting her invitation to Katie and Tom's wedding. The Beckhams became chummy with the Hollywood pair after Tom watched a Real Madrid game last year.‘I’m going to LA next week and will catch up with Tom and Katie,’ Victoria revealed.

Ofcourse they are chummy. I wonder how often Katie and Victoria are left alone while Tom and David go to the game room to "play pool."

Mariah Carey has a secret admirer. Someone has been sending the singer gifts, including a diamond ring and matching bracelet.The lovely things arrived unannounced at the Hotel de Paris ahead of Mariah’s appearance at fashion show in Monaco. Also she keeps getting sent enormous bouquets of flowers.

I hope Mariah was smart enough to destroy all the receipts! Nobody could possibly love this woman more than she already loves herself.

Nick and Jessica may have just had a "romantic" Italian vacation but, they continue to lead separate lives. Upon their return last Friday, Lachey ditched Simpson to party in Las Vegas. While rumor has it Jessica lives with her assistant Cacee Cobb and is spending her third wedding anniversary alone, in Africa. Sources tell PAGE SIX that Simpson, her dad, Joe, and Cobb will travel to Africa for Operation Smile - her pet charity that fixes cleft lips - for 10 days. . A rep for Simpson says: "Operation Smile is an organization that is very special to Jessica, and she is looking forward to participating in more missions. Nick will be unable to join Jessica on the next trip because of work commitments in Los Angeles."

Yeah, they look really miserable here. Sheesh.

Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas hangs out with Mike Tyson of all people at a party for the new album "MONKEY BUSINESS" . This is really funny. Think about it. BLACK EYED peas....Mike Tyson....see the connection?

Nicole Ritchie at the premiere of the movie which she co-stars in. "Kids In America."

Jennifer Garner proves that pregnant woman get gas....hee hee as she fills up her car.

First Jack Osbourne starts to look good now Avril Lavigne takes a bath and wears clothes that fit her.....and she is looking GOOD!

Something's never change however, here is Tara Reid trying to remember where she left her bra AND her dignity

Eva Longoria stops her daily run to play with someone's doggie. The dog seems uninterested. Must be a female.

Julia Roberts poses for a magazine layout for the first time with her twins Hazel and Phinneas. She looks like her Erin Brokovich character now.

Separated at birth? Ashlee Simpson looks a lot like Madonna here I think. Are black head bands on sale and nobody told me?



Blogger [.a.n.d.r.e.w.] said...

Madonna is really trying to bring back disco, first with the new song and now the look. I have to say though the song is reallllly catchy!

I really don't care about Jenn and Vince... WTF is she thinking? Its so funny how you can so tell those pictures were so set up to be taken... Brad and Angelina are still the hotter couple... Keep trying Jenn!

Angelina looks really hot in that picture! Thanks for posting it! =D

2:05 PM  

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