Celebrity stories and gossip that make you go "W.T.F?"

Friday, October 07, 2005

Celebrity W.T.F's Volume 61

Britney and Kevin are having some problems. Life & Style Weekly reports: "Since Spears brought home little Sean Preston, his dad Kevin has been a real brat hitting golf balls, partying and chatting on the phone until well into the night. Spears has reportedly complained that she's raising not one but, two kids now."

Gee, I didn't see this coming.

Newly-single actress Jennifer Aniston has laughed off reports she is dating 7Th Heaven heart-throb Geoff Stults.
On Celebrity W.T.F volume 50-something, I said this too but, only because Celebrity gossip mags have been reporting she is head over heels for the hunk however, Aniston's representative says, "She barely knows him".

Oooh, the BEST kind of relationship!

Yesterday I told you that Jessica and Nick were on US Weekly's cover with a story of them splitting up. Another magazine with Jessica on the cover is STAR and they are alleging that Nick Lachey cheated on his wife last month, just two days before they sang America the Beautiful at the Washington Redskins-Chicago Bears game Sept. 11.
According to the mag, a woman by the name of Danielle Calo from Columbus, Ohio got to second base with Nick. She says she shared a steamy liplock with Lachey in his hotel room. The 19-year college student says she met Jessica's hubby at a high school football game in Ohio and he invited her to his hotel. But they cut the tryst short when she got nervous and felt guilty.

She is obviously lying. Real hussies don't get nervous or know what guilt is.

Lori Majewski is great friends with Jessica Simpson. Who is she? Used to work at US WEEKLY magazine. At one point, Lori was even set to co-write a book with Jessica about Simpson's life. A few weeks ago, Lori left Us Weekly to help revamp Teen People. Which explains why Jessica has not been on the cover for the last few weeks (Except for the big break up story)
Sources say since Lori and Jessica were such good friends and Lori had a lot of pull at the magazine...Lori would ensure her friend would make the cover as often as possible.

I owe an apology to Joe Simpson, Jessica's dad. In the past I have called him a press whore and blamed him for his daughter's overexposure. I take it back.
However, I still stand firm on my view that he is a pervert, obsessed with his daughter's chest and quite frankly he gives me the creeps.

Mariah Carey may never have children, because she fears they would struggle with the pressures of having a superstar for a mother. Although she likes the idea of having a baby, she insists "the baggage of being my child" could become too much. And she is anxious over her search for the perfect man.
She says, "The guy would have to be really secure, and potentially a great father. But I'm not obsessed with having a child."

The guy would also want to have sex with her without using a condom. Let's face it - Ain't gonna happen.

Kate Moss will be arrested on suspicion of supplying cocaine when she returns to Britain. The Sun reported today that Kate will have to go to the police station where she will be formally arrested and interviewed. Moss released a statement last month after the press published photos allegedly showing her snorting cocaine in a London recording studio.
"I take full responsibility for my actions," Moss said. "I also accept that there are various personal issues that I need to address and have started taking the difficult, yet necessary, steps to resolve them."
Moss has since checked into a US cocaine rehabilitation clinic in Arizona.

I hope she's putting on weight in that clinic. Not because I want her to be healthy...I just want to see the girl have at least one stomach roll, ok, half a stomach roll.
I know. I need help. But, not as much as Kate does.

Sylvester Stallone admits he gave his co-star SHARON STONE lots of alcohol until she agreed to film the raunchy scenes in THE SPECIALIST. .
Sharon had apparently refused to be appear naked in the 1994 action adventure movie, but lost all her inhibitions when Stallone took her out for a several rounds of cocktails. Stallone recently revealed, "I thought the best thing was to get her drunk. Sharon threw down a couple of glasses and then said: 'OK - I'll do it!'".

Aren't they laws against crap like this?
Sylvester does strike me as someone who would have to get any woman drunk just to spend time with him. Movie or not.

In Charlize Theron's new movie North Country, she plays a struggling single mother who has to endure endless insults and assault from her male colleagues. Charlize recently explained how she dealt with the situation, "On breaks between filming, I would get my own back by sexually harassing all the men on the set. It was quite a laugh and I think they quite enjoyed it. In fact my co-star Woody Harrelson came in one time on his day off and when I asked him why, he replied, 'I've come in for my sexual harassment!'"

Duh. Men don't consider it harassment. Especially when it's coming from a gorgeous blonde woman. Men think harass is two words.
Her Ass.

Joaquin Phoenix nearly became an alcoholic while filming his role as Johnny Cash in the new movie Walk The Line. Country singer Cash, who was a heavy drinker prompted Phoenix into increasing his alcohol intake for a better portrayal of the character. Joaquin ealized his problem was getting out of control and in April checked himself into a rehab clinic when filming was over. He tells London magazine Time Out, "It was then that I became aware of my drinking. I wasn't an everyday drinker but didn't have anything else to do, anything to hold me down. I was leaning on alcohol to make me feel ok. "

Maybe in his next movie he can play Johnny Walker.
The whisky.
There's an excuse to get $hit faced!

Ashton Kutcher has signed up to produce another series. Asthon and his producing partner, Adam Goldberg, have inked a deal with the WB network for a comedic reality series called "Fountain of Youth."
The new show, which is set to go into production early next year, will have eight college seniors paired up with eight senior citizens on a race across America.

I wonder if his marriage to Demi Moore was the inspiration for this?
Couldn't resist.

According to the New York Post, Hugh Grant cut his hair and the effect ain't pretty. Grant says he went to his ex-girlfriend's stylist and had the excess tresses shorn off, only to discover that "I'm pug ugly with my hair cut off."

Ok, this is not a picture of his supposed new hair cut but, just look at the man. He could be completely bald and have hairs growing out of his chin and he would STILL be a MAJOR improvement to the average man who rides the Toronto subway.
Not that I've noticed.

Jennifer Lopez says she will probably have plastic surgery when she's older.
She says: "If people want to get enhancements here and there and little shots or whatever. I don't do it, but I don't want to judge because I don't know how I'll feel when I'm 40 or 50 and if that is something I would do. I know that getting older is tough- anything in excess is not good, and I guess that would be my position on it." She adds: "I think about getting older, constantly. I'm in my mid-30s now, so you start thinking, 'God, wow, I'm going to get there soon. This is crazy.

I can't imagine Jennifer in ten years. She is so completely vain as it already is. She may make even make Priscilla Presley look like SHE aged gracefully.

In case you need a reminder of the way Priscilla looks.....
I apologize in advance for the nightmare you will inevitably have....

Cameron Diaz really thinks Brits are a sex-mad lot. She told the Daily Mirror "The British are so incestuous. They pass partners around as if they were passing popcorn at a movie I saw 10 minutes of the movie Love Actually the other day and I was like: 'Oh my God, he's in love with his friend's wife! And I also have English friends- every time I show up, that person is with that person, and that person is now with that person. I don't get it."

So she is basing an entire group of people on a movie and ONE couple she knows?
If I based my opinion of ALL celebrities on Cameron's behavior than they would all be moronic idiots....which is not true, well except for Paris Hilton, Gwyneth Paltrow and a slew of others.

Comedienne Kathy Griffin is fighting to save her marriage to Matt Moline. Griffin filed for divorce last month, but now insists she hasn't given up hope on rescuing their four-year union.
She tells Page Six, "I have a one-nighter coming up in Colorado, and he's going with me. We're trying to work things out."

That's why he's actually's a one nighter.Is it just me or does this woman have the most ANNOYING voice ever?How he listened to her for as long as he did is beyond me.

Tony Danza is far from impressed with Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes' baby news -- because they're having a child out of wedlock.
Danza is confused by Cruise's behavior and believes his recent attack on Brooke Shields' decision to take medication for her postpartum depression was hypocritical considering Cruise is now living his own life with questionable morality.
The talk show host says, "I'm a little upset about this. Here's a guy out there lecturing people about drugs, but out-of-wedlock births don't seem to bother him. He's never (appearing on) my show, so it doesn't matter." He adds, "I'm happy for them, but we're going to send them to Maury (Povich's show) for a DNA test.

How can I possibly top that comment?

MORE TOMKAT news.........
When Tom and Katie's baby is born Scientology will play a major role. The couple is likely to follow the church's "silent birth" guidelines during delivery, which means no music and no talking during the birth, which also means no screaming during the pains of labor. The doctrine also states that newborns cannot be poked or prodded for medical tests or even spoken to for the first seven days of their lives, believing that babies go through so much pain during the birth, they shouldn't have to experience any further discomfort or sensory experience that could return later in life to haunt them. In fact Katie won't even be allowed any demerol.

I suppose the church of scientology is run by MEN. And until men will willingly pass a watermelon through their anal passages, I suppose this assanine belief will still prevail.

I bet Katie never screamed making the baby. But, what do I know - I wasn't in the room. Either was Tom.

Beyonce and fiancee Jay -Z in Paris for Fashion week.

Celine Dion out for a walk with her grandpa. How sweet of her to visit him in that home..........oh wait, no, sorry, it's her hubby Rene.
Je m'excuse Celine, it's an easy mistake anybody would make.

Gwyneth with the Apple of her eye...........her daughter Apple. Who is sweet to the core and wil be until she finds out she may have to compete soon for mommy's attention.

Looks like Gwyneth has another food group happening.
A bun in the oven if you will.
I reported this on Celebrity W.T.F fifty something...who can remember?
Anyhow her tummy looks fuller.

Eva Longoria from DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES on her cell phone.
Perhaps it's her gardener.
She needs her daisies seeded? Or maybe she is just pretending to be on the phone to look important. I do that sometimes.
No, really.

And Paris with her only true friend and faithful companion....her cellphone. She doesn't leave home without it.
I have a feeling it's set to vibrate.



Blogger Eclecta said...

Linda, you are wicked!!!! Reading your blog is a guilty pleasure ...



6:15 AM  
Blogger Chelsea's Mama said...

I am glad you are enjoying it....hopefully saving lots of money cuz you aren't buying those magazines...????

9:52 AM  
Blogger Bernadette said...

I give Britney and Kevin six months before they are DIVORCED!!
Especially now that Paris Hilton is single again...and probably has more money than Britney.

12:00 PM  
Blogger Chelsea's Mama said...

Oooh, good call Ben!
You are much more generous than I with your prediction...I give it another two weeks. Hee hee
With Paris Hilton single who's marriage is safe? No one's......!!

6:15 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home