Celebrity stories and gossip that make you go "W.T.F?"

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Celebrity W.T.F's Volume 48

First thing's first. Andrew, (my nephew) commented on W.T.F volume 47 that the Britney Spears/Kevin Federline baby picture I posted yesterday was a fake one being distributed throught the internet. Turns out he was right!
So disregard this photo of Sean Preston (Or whatever his name is today). This is not the baby.

This is actually Britney and Kevin's baby and it's already got a message for y'all.

Now I know why they named it P.M.S!
Ok, so it's not really the baby. But, it just goes to show that if Mama Spears really wants to avoid the paparazzi she can because NOBODY has got a photo of this kid. He's like Bin Laden, nobody knows where he is.

Christina Aguilera is one of the first people to offer her congratulations to Britney and Kevin. She told MTV News, "My assistant came in the room and she's like, 'Britney had a boy!' and I was like, 'Oh my gosh!' "I don't know where I was for a while when she was pregnant but, it really kicked in at that point. It's like, 'Wow, she had a baby! That's crazy!' "I'm overjoyed and thrilled for her. It's such an exciting time in her life and I just wish her the best."

Just weeks ago Christina was saying how much Britney had let herself go and that she was a has-been. I wonder what's with the sudden attitude change?
Maybe Christina's preggers now and wants to live on a deep fried cheezie diet for a while ???

Mariah Carey has begun a regime of water exercises to achieve a new toned figure. The singer has slimmed down her curvy frame after meeting with an instructor in the Caribbean.
Her manager Benny Medina says: "Mariah is working with Patricia Gay, a trainer she met is St Bart's. Patricia travels with Mariah to maintain her program of water exercises."

That Mariah. Water exercises? The only water exercise she seems to be doing is lifting a wine glass! Any excuse for her to show off her ta-ta's is more like it.

Director Guy Ritchie wants to cast his wife Madonna in another movie, despite the horrible reviews they had for their collaboration of "Swept Away." The 2002 movie performed so badly when it was released in America, it never made it to British theatres. But, Mr. Ritchie - back with new movie Revolver - is adamant. He says: "Never say never. I like making movies. If I had the scripts I'd just make five films in a row without a break at all. I could go on forever."

Oh we love your movies Guy, just not the ones with your wife in them. Madonna is a better singer than an actress and she can't sing live so what does that tell you?

Jamie Lynn Discala has left her husband.
The "Sopranos" star (She plays Tony's daughter Meadow Soprano) told pals she left her hubby/manager, A.J. Discala, a month ago. A witness gabbed that Jamie Lynn has already moved on with New York club promoter Keith Collins. One witness said "They were all over each other, making out and then before they walked out of the bathroom, she said make sure not to tell anyone that she and A.J. have split."
Kevin Collins himself when asked said: "Jamie Lynn is a good friend of mine, but I am not commenting right now. She is a sweet girl. It was a good time."

A good time? Don't let Tony Soprano hear this talk about his daughter!!! Someone is asking for concrete shoes to swim with the fishes!

Here is Jamie with her estranged husband/manager in happier times I suppose - well she looks happy. He looks like he's wearing underwear that shrank.

Seems Teri Hatcher was a sorry sport about not getting an Emmy Sunday night. Hatcher was nominated but, lost out for Best Comedic Actress by her "Desperate Housewives" castmate Felicity Huffman (Who plays Lynette on the show) - and then refused to pose with Huffman backstage.
"Felicity wanted a picture with all of her co-stars," said a source, "and everyone else took a picture with her but Teri, who refused."
The egos on the set have clashed apparently since "Housewives" became a hit.

Tsk tsk for Teri! Felicity's role is much more difficult - playing a mother of four terrors who's hubby is never around to help out. She did deserve the Emmy, anyone who watches the show knows that Teri's character Susan just trips over herself a lot and gets to make out with the gorgeous plumber Mike...geez and she wants an Emmy on top of it all? Somebody's being very selfish! Give me the role. I don't need to be paid and I don't need an award, just kissing the plumber would be sufficient, heck I'll just hand him his tools to be near him.

I don't think Teri is the only Desperate Housewife who is jealous. Just look at the ones who DID pose for the photo - they are all grabbing on to that Emmy like a fifty year old single woman with no teeth grabs on to a wedding bouquet when she FINALLY catches it.

Jennifer Lopez is being targeted YET AGAIN by animal rights campaigner Heather Mills McCartney for wearing mink eyelash extensions. Last week, J-Lo's Sweetface fashion label offices, in New York, were stormed by Heather and PETA activists who staged a protest against the label's use of fur. Heather is now stepping up her campaign against Jennifer and is outraged after discovering J.Lo wears eyelashes made from mink fur.

If Heather was smart she would apologize to Jennifer and invite her out camping. Jennifer would be in the woods with a get up like this. Heather could pretend to want to go for a hike and then Jennifer would wander the woods and get shot by a hunter who mistakes her for an animal since she is covered in fur.
Jennifer would learn a lesson, Heather would get her point across and no animals would really be hurt in the process.
Everybody wins!!!

More Jennifer Lopez news...she has confirmed she will star alongside third husband Marc Anthony in an upcoming movie WHO KILLED HECTOR LAVOE? Marc will take the lead role of Hector Lavoe - the man who brought salsa music to the US in 1975 - while Lopez will play his onscreen wife.

Well - that is if she doesn't go camping with Heather McCartney.

As for the NICE Jennifer...... Jennifer Garner is constantly being asked whether she knew her baby's sex or if she had a name picked out already- has somehow managed to dodged most baby and marriage questions. However, she recently let it slip on the show "Access" that she is going to have a girl!

Jen looks adorable here. Her and Ben Affleck are expecting very soon. I bet anything baby won't be named after mom.
Just for the fact that daddy's ex has the same name. (a.k.a. J-LO)

Johnny Depp is upset. He will not star alongside Rolling Stone Keith Richards, because the rocker's schedule is too busy. Johnny had been looking forward to Keith making a cameo appearance as his dad in 2006's Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest. Keith was the inspiration behind Depp's alter-ego Jack Sparrow.

I know Johnny's heart was set on Keith Richards but, surely there are other wrinkled up - English accented - drug addicts still around who could do just as good a job?
Oh, I forgot, Mick is in the Rolling Stones also and he would be busy too.

Jennifer Aniston is ready to date. At least that is what she said on "The Oprah Winfrey Show" Monday. In one of her first TV interviews since filing for divorce from Brad Pitt earlier this year, Aniston said, "I'm doing so well. It's the media that won't move on -You just want to say Come on, people! Turn a page!'"
When Winfrey asked Aniston if she was ready to "start the whole dating thing again," the 36-year-old actress excitedly replied, "yes" - checking her watch as if to say it was time.

I am sure she checked her watch to see if her biological clock was still ticking. Jennifer has made it no secret she wants kids as soon as possible. I feel so sorry for the ulimatums there will be on her new man - She wants kids NOW and she used to sleep regularly with Brad Pitt....what man is going to want any of this pressure? On top of that he will NEVER be allowed to go within ten feet of Angelina Jolie!!
Good Luck Jen, you are going to need it.

Gwyneth's been gushing to the press again...this time about daughter Apple. Gwyneth who lives in London says she feels "more European" than American...and it's certainly showing, with the language Apple's picking up. She told USA today: "Agua was her first word. She says a lot of words in Spanish. "

My, How adorable! Baby Apple was so dehydrated her first word was water in Spanish. What were her second, third, forth etc words?
"Mommy please don't suffocate me !" - in Italian perhaps??

Kate Moss was dropped today from an advertising campaign for Hennes & Mauritz, Europe's largest clothing chain, after pictures in the Mirror newspaper last week showed her snorting lines of cocaine. ``H&M will cancel the planned advertising campaign with model Kate Moss,'' the company said today in an e- mail. ``
Supermodel Kate has appeared on the front pages of British newspapers since the Mirror published the photos.

How did H & M not know Kate had a coke problem? She is so thin that I bet this dress is actually the doilie from her grandma's coffee table.

Oh and Nadia...further to your comment under W.T.F Volume 47....I agree that Tori Spelling is the second ugliest person ever.
Although Victoria Gotti was a good choice as the first, as you suggested, my choice of the UGLIEST person


Donatella Versace.

Victoria Gotti is close but, pales in comparison....LITERALLY

No wonder celebrities flock to be photographed beside Donatella!

She makes even Camilla look like a supermodel!



Blogger Dill said...

gosh you're brave putting so many ugly women on your blog at one time. How did your computer not crash? I so agree with all of you. These women make me feeeeeeeeeel beauuuuuuuttiiiiiifuuuuullllll. Dill

8:21 PM  
Blogger Bernadette said...

I am beautiful..compared to these chicks...and I may not be thin as Kate Moss (is anyone??)...but I'm not running on cocaine either!!

8:59 AM  
Blogger Nadia said...

Ha - thanks for that Linda. I actually have this suspicion that Donatella and Victoria Gotti are the SAME WOMAN. Has anyone ever seen them in the same room together? I think not.

Think about it - both Italian, both with the long cheesy blonde hair and awful outfits. I think that at the very very least, they could be related.


9:16 AM  
Blogger [.a.n.d.r.e.w.] said...

Great entry. Actually cuz I'm obsessed with Christina I know for a fact she did recently say she did not say those mean things about Britney. There was also sometihng in InTouch recently where it said she didn't say that. Christina also said shes disappointed in how these reporters take their integrity for granted and try and make the rivalry between her and Britney worse and its something both her fans and Britneys shouldn't believe. I think by her congratulating Britney shows how false those rumors of a "feud" are.

7:45 PM  

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