CUZ I SAID SO!

Celebrity stories and gossip that make you go "W.T.F?"

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Booze Cruise

People..... Don't ever, ever, EVER let your daughters go away during spring break. Sometimes it is referred to as March Break or reading week. Reading week my ass! I just came back from a 3 night cruise that left California and docked in Baha, Mexico for a day. I travelled with several hundred college students and it was definitely an experience I will never forget.

The things I witnessed were disturbing - even more so because nobody intervened, there was no voice of reason and it was like a bad car accident. You know you shouldn't slow down and look but, you are human and can't help it.

These people were drunk all day. They went to bed drunk, woke up drunk, swam drunk, danced drunk, ate drunk.....you name it. Also let me just explain to you that this cruise also had families aboard. Families with small children. Impressionable young children. Some of these children witnessed what I witnessed. There were seniors on board, young newlywed couples, pregnant woman, newborn babies, couples having anniversaries, people celebrating their 40th birthday and a family reunion or two. Some of these people also witnessed what I witnessed.

I won't get too much into details but, lets just say "Girls gone wild" Ain't got nothing on this. Yes folks, this is the future generation, some of them may be running the country one day (Hopefully not this one although anything would be an improvement. Perhaps they will become parents, lawyers, doctors or teachers.

I can understand someone having too much to drink and throwing their inhibitions out the window. I always say "Nothing surprises me" and apparently I am lying.

We went on a tour the Saturday inside of Mexico - as part of the tour they took us to an open air flea market in Mexico. It was fun and on route to the flea market the guide explained the city to us and gave us a history lesson in culture. After the flea market and STILL PART OF THE TOUR (Important to emphasize this) We were dropped off for an "Authentice Mexican lunch" Consisting of nacho chips, some salsa, guacamole and chopped tomatoes (Gee, all the stuff you can buy at Dominion). We were dropped off at a restaurant slash bar and left to fend for ourselves. I am travelling by the way with a girlfriend who is a year older than me. We both snack on our stale taco chips and hear music blaring from upstairs. We both enjoy dancing and think........Hmm - we have a few hours before we need to get back on the ship. We go upstairs and enter the bar area. It is so packed it is beyond a fire hazard. I guess all the Mexican fire inspectors were busy .......anyhow, nothing could prepare us for what we were about to see.

It is ONE O'CLOCK in the afternoon (Must emphasize this point also and you will understand why) There is a space at the bar which we head over to. We are surprised we get a spot as this place is so busy so we excitingly jump in. My friend orders a marguerita. I cannot tolerate alcohol on a good day but, hey I am on vacation. Sure, why not? I have one as well. The glass the bartender gives us our drinks in is bigger than my head. (For those of you who know me......I got a big ass head. I have a big ass too but, that's another blog)

The music is blaring and my friend and I smile at each other. People are dancing, smiling, having fun, the music selections are all of my favorites. I have found my people. Until.......From the corner of my eye a young lady (Well, she isn't a lady for long......you'll see) Makes her way to the bar and whispers something to the bartender. Next thing I know he is lifting her over the bar on the other side of where we are standing. She gets on the bar and starts dancing. Pretty harmless no?? Oh, wait for it. Then another girl gets lifted on the bar, and another, and another. There was finally around 6 girls dancing on the bar. I've seen Coyote Ugly so I get the concept. Yeah, whatever. I take a sip of my marguerita, I take another........instant headache. I give the ten gallon drink to my friend and tell her I cannot drink it. I guess these six girls on the bar have had several of the ten gallon margueritas. It all happens so fast. People are cheering, yelling things, suddenly they are screaming and going nuts. I look up. Three of the six girls are topless, two are kissing each other and the sixth has her jeans half way down her bum. This simply cannot be! I look over at my friend who's jaw has nearly hit my knee.......and yes, I am standing.

Before either us can say WTF??? (What the f___) The entire bar seems to suddenly have video cameras going, flash bulbs and the "dancing girls" seem to be everywhere. On the chairs, on the staircase to the washroom, on the window sills. It is one drunken flash nude fest.

Again, let me remind you. It is one o'clock in the afternoon. What time did these people start drinking I wonder? Where are their parents? Are any of them parents themselves? (I shudder at this) Why is nobody stopping them? How can this be allowed?

I glance over at my friend who has gotten over the shock and is now snapping photos like a mad papparazzi person. She explains to me when she sees my horrified expression that she has never seen anything quite like this and needs to capture the moment on film.

My head hurts and everyone is screaming. I need to pee. Bad. I walk through the drunken crowd in a haze from the cigarette smoke and proceed to the bathroom. I won't elaborate what is happening on the staircase but, it involves several young females (19? 20 Years?) , whip cream and some wagging tongues. I pretend this is a natural sight for me and go into the woman's bathroom (I told you, I had to go BAD) Once inside there is a huge lineup of girls. Most of them very young that were wearing less than a streetwalker would. Their mascara is smeared, hair is rumpled and they are all talking in that loud drunken stammer. All I can hear around me is giggling an flurries of "Oh my God, I did it! I don't care, like, I don't know anybody here, like, anyways!" As I am thinking to myself, yes, this is true they don't know anybody but, have they never heard of six degrees of separation?? Someone they know is bound to see them, a friend of a cousin of a boyfriend of a sibling of a coworker of the grocery clerk......you know how these things work. Besides so many people are filming the shenanigans and taking pictures these girls will be a sad email joke or on the internet surely by dinner time!

I do my business and meet up with my friend again. She is three quarters through her marguerita and has not started to attempt the remainder of mine yet. We agree to leave straight away. As soon as she finishes the drinks. I notice now there are a different set of women on the bar. I also notice that it seems the majority of these girls have had work done (And I don't mean on their house) These are young girls! Surely they have not finished growing yet? What surgeon would do this to them! They are tall, short, fat, thin, very fat, blonde, brunette, redheads, caucasian, black, spanish, oriental........they are people's daughters, girlfriends, cousins, confidants... and they are completely hammered and exposing themselves to the world. Nobody seems concerned. Except for me and my friend (Who is still snapping away photos - to show the guys at works she says)

I urge her to finish her drink so we can leave. I can feel it getting ugly. Really ugly and it does. In the far back corner there is a group of girls doing things to each other I have only ever saw on late night showcase. (I turned it there by accident and then the converter ran out of batteries of course so I had to leave it on the channel......) This is the innocent part. There are three or four guys standing in front of them filming, there are dozens and dozens of other guys ogling and hollering encouragement. My stomach turns as I notice hands groping and pulling at body parts on the girls. The hands belong to some of the ogling perverts. The girls continue to "perform" in their drunken haze as they are prodded, grabbed, rubbed.......you name it.
I frantically look around for the bouncer. A bar must have a bouncer. This must be stopped straight away! I scan the crowded room and yes! YES! There is a bouncer. I can go and tell him....why is he doing that? The bouncer is holding up a very heavy woman, turning her upside down and sticking her crotch in his face. The crowd surrounding this bizarre scene is going nuts!
I have had enough. I point to the grope fest in the corner and say to my friend "The line has been crossed and we must leave immediately" Thankfully, she agrees and is equally shocked and disgusted and we leave.

According to other guests on the cruise ship, this behavior was going on at the pool (Luckily we both were bloated and crampy and decided not to go to the pool that day), The disco (We missed it because we left early to get an early night) And several other areas of the ship. Apparently, it happens all the time. Not just because it was spring break, however, it was worse and much more abundant due to this. Apparently these short weekend cruises are know as booze cruises and to my suprise many people we met admitted they knew about these traditions and behaviors before they boarded.

Apparently one woman broke down at the pool when she saw some of the girls being so brazen and sexual. The woman explained that when she was a young girl she got very drunk one night and ended up being gang raped by four guys. She didn't even flash them or behave badly but, she was with some girls who did. The sights on the ship flooded horrible memories back for her.
She was very upset and angry at the girls for their behavior and irresponsiblity.

I was sad. The woman's movement went back centuries for me. How will we ever be taken seriously now? These young girls have NO idea what their mothers, grandmothers, great grandmothers went through for equality. Sadly, I think they thought THIS was empowerment. They thought they were in control. I read stories and saw television specials like Maury Povich and Heraldo about spring bread rape. It is a major epidemic that nobody talks about. Let me stipulate that I do not think ANY MAN HAS A RIGHT to rape a woman but, I must say that after what I say, AND I CANNOT BELIEVE I AM SAYING THIS...........No wonder it happens! And what about the innocent girls who are in the wrong place at the wrong time???

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't ever let your daughters go away during spring break! No matter how old, how sweet, how innocent, how perfect, how angelic she is!!! Look what happened to me. I ended up in a bar and will be scarred for the things I witnessed. I knew when it was time to go. (In fact we should of gone sooner) Will your daughter leave in time???

DON'T RISK IT!!!

CUZ I SAID SO.............Linda

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